Texas Rangers 2014 Position Moves
We all know how awesome Martin’s arm is in centerfield so I suggest that during home games he be placed in Greene’s Hill. I believe he could jump the fence to make routine plays and would be able to shag home run balls thus preventing fans from seeing that one fan from doing another dance. If a runner was to tag up on a catch I know that Leonys could still throw him out.
Instead of first base or left field the Rangers could move him to peanut vendor. His range is awesome and he could easily cover sections 321-326 without blinking an eye though he may pop up a bag or two.
Make him the catcher. With the deceptive movement on his fastball he would throw out every runner trying to steal a base. It would look like his throw was going to be outside but at the last moment it would move to the runner’s side of the base and BOOM they’re out!
I fear for my life. Beltre stays at third. I love you Adrian.
His fake hustle could be best utilized as a batboy. He would quickly retrieve bats and hand new balls to the home plate umpire in lightning fashion. A new twitter account would be erected in his honor and it would be @BatBoyTracker. M.C. Hammer would then make a new single about batboys and resurrect his career. I really hope that I don’t need to explain the M.C. Hammer reference. If you’re a true fan of the game then you get it.
Elvis would be moved to secondary third baseman where his job is to pretend he’s catching pop ups. Profar can cover second and short at this time.
Nolan would be moved to…Oh, yeah I forgot.
The bullpen phone will be replaced by a fake one so that Wash “thinks” he’s making the right call to the ‘pen.
Another move made by the team as a whole will be the destruction of any bunt related charts and statistics.